Monday, March 12, 2012

The Gift of Losing Your Balance; or Lessons Learned After a Fall

When you’re a massage therapist, breaking your arm is a complete tragedy. So what a disaster it was when I lost my balance. I fell. I fell hard and broke my humerus, quite badly, which frankly, was not very funny. Particularly since I depend on two working arms to perform my job.
Nope, not the first big fall in my life, but this time was different. I was different…and as it turns out, it has not been much of a tragedy at all.
Breaking my arm broke me free of the thought that I AM what I DO.  I truly had no idea of what a trap that was in my life, or how disempowering and limiting that was. 
It caused me to SLOW DOWN.  And slowing down, combined with the fact that I could not DO what I had defined myself as allowed me the space and time to realize something truly profound: I can always count on WHO I AM, and I am not defined by WHAT I DO.  The doing in my life (jobs and other roles women play—mother, lover, daughter, friend) can and does change, sometimes in an instant. But the key was learning to enjoy and appreciate the priceless value of WHO I AM and to be darn sure that what I do reflects that whenever possible. Might have taken me 45 years and one broken arm, but not such a price to pay for a gift like that; in fact, this latest fall and its effect on my life has been one of the greatest gifts I have ever received!
Then there is the balance. When you can be fully aware of who you ARE some really cool things start to happen.  The winds of change no longer knock you off base. The inevitable criticisms of what you DO will cease to hurt, and will become simply information that you can choose to act on or ignore. Life becomes easier, and letting go of resentment and anger are effortless.
"If your DOING is consistent with your BEING, your days will be joyful"
...and your work will be a reflection of your true self.  Gratitude and love will become second nature, and things will flow with far less stress and upset. 
[My advice to you] SLOW DOWN.  Breathe.  Listen for the truths to come bubbling up and feel for who you really ARE. Step solidly into that beautiful you—trust me, once you’re standing there you can NEVER be knocked off balance, no matter how great the fall.

Deb Vincent Evans, aka Princess Geek, in her current expression of who she is, practices massage therapy at Stability Therapeutic Massage and is an educational technology consultant at Princess Geek, Guidess to the Technoverse.  She lives on Fallen Apple Farm in Halfmoon with her partner, the Magicman, and her kids, horses, dogs and other assorted small beings that call her mom.
Deb is one of the new bloggers for the Golden Briefcase and this is the first of her monthly work/life balance contributions. Help us show her a warm welcome by leaving her a comment!
#ShesaBoss and #theGB blog ©


  1. As a fellow LMT, I appreciate your honest and brave expression of your experience. Bravo to you for allowing it to be an open door to finding, or remembering, your true self.

  2. Nice blog, Deb. Great perspective turning lemons into lemonade! And it's so important to keep the doing consistent with the being--thanks for the reminder.